Change & Anxiety: Fearing It, Managing It, & Accepting Life As It Alters Before Us

If nothing else, 2020 has been a year of change:

Change of pace, change of routine, change of environment, change of mindset, etc.

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Even the future and our plans for it are sure to change as a result of the new standards we must uphold to protect the health of the general public.

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The past seven months have held an amount of change immeasurable by any human scale.

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For most, change is accompanied by a wave of uncertainty and anxiety:

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What next?

What am I to do?

How will this impact me?

What should I do to prepare?

Will I be able to continue doing what brings me joy?

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When I am faced with change, I am sad to say that I rarely bear it with acceptance and simplicity. I often resort to worry and irrational thinking. I am an extreme perfectionist; I attempt to prepare for any and every outcome possible.

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When life gives me something new or unexpected, my first instinct is to panic. I freeze, paralyzed by anxiety and shock.

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I often respond with sadness. My brain immediately concludes that I have failed, and I begin spiraling; as I come to doubt the world around me as well my place in it, those nearby will attest to my silent, glum, and irritable demeanor.

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Why We Fear Change:

Anxiety is categorized as the fear of what is come; both the unknown and the anticipated events that lie in wait within our near and distant futures.

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When an individual with naturally high anxiety or an anxiety disorder experiences change, it can feel as though all of the work and effort put into preparing for the expected outcome was all for nothing. Thus, being thrust into a new and unexpected circumstance is the mental equivalent of a classical Roman prisoner, armed with not a mere chance of survival, being thrust into the Colosseum with a bloodthirsty lion: ill-equipped, defenseless, and apathetically hopeless.

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As is the case with most mental illness contexts, structure, familiarity, and well-developed regimens provide immense comfort and relief from the all-too-commonly debilitating symptoms.

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When the routine or plan is abruptly disrupted, mental illness symptoms are given the opportunity to arise; and, in many aspects, are evidently more severe and limiting, for the sufferer had no prior warning and therefore could not - overtime - adapt to the growing evolution of his/her environment.

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Unfortunately, both sudden and slow change do not affect only those with mental hardships; their reach extends to all beings.

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My belief is that we as people are scared of change, because it proves that we are not in full control of our lives. Whether it be the exact change itself, what caused it, or the events to follow, we are clearly shown that each individual aspect of our lives and the world in which we live are not under our direct authority. Change provides ruthless and unapologetic evidence that we are not the all-knowing and invincible powers we long to be.

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Simply, many changes that will take place in life are beyond the scope of our imagination.

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Accepting Change: Embracing It & Yourself:

Change is, paradoxically and quite eccentrically, one of the only certainties of life: Standards and societal norms change as the world grows. People change as they grow and develop. The Earth changes as years pass.

Whether we recognize it or not, we are taught to change.

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Think About It:

In school, we learn new concepts, materials, and facts - Our brains our changing each day with the information we absorb. Furthermore, we are endlessly encouraged to apply ourselves and work to the fullest potential we posses in preparation for the changes ahead. The education system teaches us to grow and adapt from year to year - the change from elementary school to middle school; the change from middle school to high school; the change from high school to higher education or the workforce. The very foundations in which schools seek to build for their students are that of which to provide insight, stability, and opportunity for them in the ever-changing world.

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Changing schools, changing hairstyles, they are simple - in theory. However, even these occurrences can - and often do - lead to high levels of stress and anxiety in individuals.

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Yet, if you are experiencing change, you are growing; you are being presented with a new opportunity to learn and adapt.

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If You Are Struggling To Accept Changes In Your Life, Keep The Following In Mind:

~ Asses your reality: What aspects of this situation can you control? What aspects outrank your own abilities? Honestly identify your actuality. This can lessen the burden you feel to remain in control of every single detail.

~ You cannot have utter control at all times. The ability to surrender your weaknesses and shortcomings does not diminish your power or strength. It is a show of humanism and wisdom.

~ You do not have to endure it by yourself. Ask for help, support, and guidance. There is no shame in seeking out and drawing upon the strength of others.

~ You change every day. From each moment to the next, your life and very being are taking on new forms.

~ Change evolves; one day, what began as an extensive revolution in your life's story, will be a distant memory of what gave way to who you are now.

~ There is no reason to believe that you cannot persevere and prove successful.

~ Change is difficult for everyone. You are not alone in this.

~ You have survived all changes up until this point.

~ This change can make you stronger.

~ Remain calm.

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My friends, I am far from perfect.

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Change is quite frankly one of my biggest fears.

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I have many years, trials, and errors to undergo before I become remotely close to the level of confidence in myself and trust in the world that I strive to possess.

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This blog post is not final; nor is it an Earth-shattering solution to your fears of the unpredictable universe. It is an expression of my own encounters with what I view as a common struggle; an open dialogue that shall continue to spark conversations about hardship, hope, and healing.

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Whatever is to come from this odd and unknown present period, I long for you to know that I believe in you and your capability.

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Normalcy shall once again arise.

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Trouble and turmoil are not permanent.

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When at last we land upon the ground, we will look to the turbulent skies in thanks for our luck in emerging from the storm.

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Stay strong.

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In light & peace,

Sofia F.

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Look with your eyes up and out towards what is ahead.

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